Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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