But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
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If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
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I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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