omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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