he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
Randomize
