Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
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