Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Randomize