we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
The cop let us off with a warning because I had more Twitter followers than he did. The future is terrifying.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
