Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
Randomize
