i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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