When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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