so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
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