before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Blood and glitter go together right?
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize
