I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
there is puke in my bra ... again
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