dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Randomize
