did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
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