ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
Randomize
