A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
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