Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
Just invented taco cereal.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
Also I think I drunkenly signed up to be an uber driver or something because they keep emailing me to fill out a background check
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Randomize
