see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
