My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Terrible idea I love it
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years