She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
