if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Randomize
