i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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