In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Randomize
