whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Randomize
