She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize