Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
