we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
I need to sanitize my soul.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
