you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
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