I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
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