can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
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