i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
Randomize
