i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
