So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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