Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
Randomize
