i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Randomize
