I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
Randomize
