ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
Randomize