is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
It was like giving head to a cactus.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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