I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
