Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
Randomize
