As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize