Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
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