I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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