Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Randomize
