She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Randomize
