After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize
