I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
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