Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
Randomize
