..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
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